A Queen's Best Friend
by chrisrose
Summary: Mary mourns the one she left behind. Bash tries to console her. Spoilers for episodes 1x01-1x08. Set soon after 1x08 "Fated". Mary/Bash, mentions Mary/Francis. Check my profile if you wanna vote in a poll about 1x08. What? I might as well advertise it here. It's related! :P


**Title:** A Queen's Best Friend

**Author:** C. Rosevere (chrisrose)

**Written:** Dec. 13, 2013

**Genre:** Humor/Parody/Romance?

**Rating:** PG?

**Spoilers:** Reign episodes 1x01-1x08, set soon after 1x08 "Fated".

**Summary:** Mary mourns the one she left behind. Bash tries to console her.

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**A QUEEN'S BEST FRIEND **

**by: chrisrose**

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"I miss him so much!" Mary wailed mournfully.

"He's safer where he is. You did the right thing." Bash tried to soothe her. The poor darling was pacing when she really should be resting.

They'd had a grueling journey, galloping as fast as their stolen steeds could take them away from the palace. Away from Mary's _former_ fiancé, Francis. Far enough away now that it seemed safe to stop at this stream, drink some water, and give the horses a chance to cool down.

But they couldn't stop long. Francis had probably recovered from the shock and picked himself up off the ground by now - at least Bash hoped so - they'd been gone three days. It was a damn good thing he hadn't thought to chase them on horseback instead of running after on foot and then dramatically dropping to his knees as they rode out of sight. Their father wouldn't want Francis traipsing around the countryside anyway. He'd likely sent soldiers after them. No doubt Francis was sulking and having revenge sex with Olivia or someone.

Bash gritted his teeth at the thought of his half-brother. That lucky bast- well, no. Bash was the bastard son of King Henry. Francis was that lucky _legitimate_ heir to the throne of France. Although Francis could indeed be a bastard when it came to bedding women with no care for damaging their reputation - even unmarried Queens such as Mary, who would be ruined if it became known that her virtue was no longer intact.

Only Francis wasn't so fortunate after all, for Mary had abruptly broken their engagement - to prevent a vision Nostradamus had of his death, were they to wed. And so she'd hopped on a horse and run away with Bash instead! Alright, she hadn't asked him to run away with her exactly. But it wasn't safe to go alone. He _had_ to tag along to protect her from the countless hordes who wanted the Queen of Scotland's head - even more since Mary was perceived to be a threat who could claim England's throne as well. But still. She was with _him_ now! Bash could only hope Mary's affections might sway away from Francis and towards him, since they were finally alone together. Maybe if they could have a damn conversation that didn't revolve around Francis. Damn it.

"How could I leave him behind!" His beloved's tortured cry snapped him out of his brooding.

"You know it was the only way, Mary." Perhaps if he rubbed her shoulder and gazed soulfully into her eyes...

"But I love him! He's my best friend in the whole world!"

Mary's big brown eyes filled with tears and her adorably pouty lips wobbled. Bash wanted to kiss her. He was struck by a wave of fond nostalgia for their last kiss under similarly emotionally distressed circumstances. Pity there was no alcohol at hand this time to put her in the mood.

"I can't do this. We must go back!" Mary made a move toward her horse. Bash wrapped both arms around her.

"Darling, won't you give _me_ a chance to make you happy?" He gave Mary his best puppy-dog eyes.

"I-I don't know, Bash. I already miss him and those sloppy kisses of his. The dear, sweet, loyal-"

"There, there." Bash crushed Mary to his chest and stroked her hair. "I'll be your new best friend. I'll be much more loyal than _he_ ever was. And I can kiss sloppily... if that's what you're into."

"Oh, Bash!" Mary sobbed brokenly. "We've been through so much together. I'll never forget him. Never! Even though I _did_ kind of forget him for awhile." Mary looked ashamed at this admission.

"It's just...It's been one crisis after another, you know? Things have been so hectic at Court with the castle being invaded all the time...by pagans and rapists and _Olivia_ - she was the worst. I hate to leave my dearest love in _her_ hands."

Bash tried to contain his jealousy. Mary would come around. He'd win her love yet with his patient devotion.

"I can't believe I left him behind. He'll be so hurt! Are you sure we can't go back for him?" Mary pleaded.

"It's just not practical, my sweet. He'd slow us down. How would we carry him on horseback?" Bash reminded her gently. He pulled her closer, then wished he hadn't when she let out an anguished howl, directly into his ear.

"STERRRRLIIIIIIING!"

**The End**

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**Author's Note:** Yes I *do* like Mary & Bash (Francis, not so much, as you can probably tell. :P) although I might be mocking them *slightly* here. More like, snarking on the TV writers' poor handling of Mary/Bash. Btw, a silly poll for ep 1x08 can be found on my profile page. :) Okay, you got me! That's the main reason I wrote this fic, to promote the poll! ;)


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